You Can’t Fill That Gaping Hole With External Things
I believe that you can easily trade addictions. We are all addicted to something, especially now with technology. There are things that you think you can “take or leave” but if you really look closely at your habits, you’d be lying to yourself if you say that you don’t have some sort of vice. I am no stranger to addiction. I grew up watching family members have addictions to many things. My birth mother was an active alcoholic, drug addict, and shopping addict the entire time I lived with her. I didn’t have a great teacher. I watched her blow all her money on substances and things. She came into quite a bit of money when my great-grandmother passed away, bought a new house with all new furnishings, and blew the rest in record time. Soon after she kicked me out of the house, she and my stepdad lost their home and were forced to move out of state because they couldn’t afford to live in California any longer. Either that or they were running from creditors. She thought she could fill her giant hole with external things. I am sure they made her feel good for a hot minute but that feeling never lasts. For instance, she bought thousand-dollar palm trees for the backyard. We didn’t need these but I believe they made her feel good until the house was taken from her. She had a terrible childhood and she has been actively trying to fill that emptiness with things since then. I do feel bad for her because I am not sure she will ever experience real joy.
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